The Resource That Has Helped 1000s Of Parents Raise Healthy, Safe, And Strong Daughters

Managing Your Parenting Concerns Is Easier When You Have The Right Information

Dear Parent or Caring Adult, My name is Kathy Masarie. For nearly three decades, I’ve focused all of my personal and professional energies on the well-being of families. During this time, I have helped 1000s of parents and school professionals raise healthy children and create strong families. I know it’s not easy being a parent who’s trying to raise a healthy, happy and strong daughter… especially when you’re feeling pulled in many directions with more demands, more pressure and higher expectations than you can handle. And when you worry about your daughter’s sexuality or her safety, it can be overwhelming. So I want to take a minute and let you know everything is going to be fine. How can I say this? Because I know how you feel. Raising a healthy, happy, and strong daughter wasn’t easy for me either and I certainly had challenges of my own — just like you. Let me explain…

When My Daughter, Kaitlin, Turned 12, I Panicked

I panicked because I experienced an excruciating load of memories from my own youth. When I was 12, my family moved to a new town. I went from loving myself as a free and wild tomboy to a geeky misfit surrounded by peers with lipstick, pantyhose, giggling and cliques. I was overwhelmed, with few coping skills and no one to talk to. I focused on school, stifled my natural exuberance, and became a quiet, shy girl no one really noticed. This was my way of life until 10th grade, when I wanted to show the real me who was “wild and free” and not the “quiet, good girl” everyone saw. The best strategy I came up was to be “bad” and go to parties where drinking made me feel like I belonged and that I was “cool.” My best friend, who hung out with the “hoods,” started shooting speed and lost herself in needles and drugs.

I Didn’t Want Kaitlin To Have The Same Experience I Had Growing Up

In the end, I survived. However, this is not the experience I wanted for my daughter. How could I support her through the teen years? How would she learn to be who she is: her full exuberant, competent, and confident self? Would she have someone to talk to when her Dad or I were not enough, someone with wisdom beyond her young friends?

That’s When I Discovered The Coming Of Age Ceremony

An answer came when Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia and The Shelter of Each Other, gave a talk here in Portland. Dr. Pipher shared a myriad of ways to build community for our kids, and one that really stood out was Coming of Age ceremonies. It is a big deal to become a teenager and, unless you are in the Jewish faith, no one even notices. A Coming of Age ceremony acknowledges this important transition time to the budding teen and his or her parents — and with this new freedom comes new responsibilities. It asks parents to give teens room to practice independence and it asks the teen to responsibly embrace this newfound power and privilege. It also brings together adults who care about and love this budding teenager, adults who will be there for them when the going gets rough in the tumultuous teen years.

I Gingerly Shared The Idea With My Daughter

After I read the coming-of-age quilt story from Mary’s book, I carefully shared it with Kaitlin. To my relief, she loved the idea. She immediately set about making a list of all the adults she would like to contribute to her quilt — relatives, family friends, and teachers — the people who were important to her. Her aunt Cindy volunteered to sew the quilt together (Phew! Talk about sharing the work!). We added in squares from Kaitlin’s baby blanket and photos from her childhood transferred onto fabric by a local copy shop.

Each Adult Made A Promise Of How They Would Help Kaitlin During Her Teenage Years

When the day of the ceremony arrived, many women were able to attend, including her grandma who drove 8 hours that day to be there. After the presentation of the quilt, each person described what her quilt square represented. They each made a promise of how they would help Kaitlin in her teen years. Her sewing teacher promised to help with a sewing crisis; her piano teacher promised to take her to recitals; a friend promised to help her understand the value of female friendships; her aunt promised to share creativity; and her grandma promised unconditional love.

As A Teenager And Now An Adult, Kaitlin Has Had A Loving Community Of Women She Can Count On

Most of us were teary-eyed throughout the ceremony. At the end, everyone shared cake and laughter and stories. Through her teenage years and now into young adulthood, Kaitlin has had a community of loving women and men she can count on, who let her know she is loved for who she is and that she matters.

Professionally, I Saw Parents Struggling In Isolation Every Day

As a pediatrician in the 1980s and 1990s, I saw parents, especially parents of teens, struggling alone with big family problems like pregnancy, depression, risky drinking and drug use. You see, I have always been focused on prevention and early action. Families with younger children who came to my practice began to network with each other and I saw an opportunity to support families as their children grew into adolescents.

I Convened Experts To Review The Best Parenting Resources Available

In 1996, I decided to leave my medical practice to start the non-profit organization, Full Esteem Ahead, and then Family Empowerment Network to “support parents to support kids and one another.” My first task? I put together a team of parents and professionals — industry parenting experts, school teachers and counselors — to identify and read the best parenting resources that were available in the marketplace. We discussed our findings with one another and identified over 120 authors whose perspectives and voices fit our values. From there, we sorted all of the resources into 10 easy-to-understand topic areas that could be explored by parents and school professionals alike.

Parents Are The Best Resource For Helping Their Children Thrive

Next, we had to figure out how best to share this information with the most important person in your child’s life… you! One of the values that guided our work was that parents (both alone and in groups) are the best resource for helping their children thrive in the transition from childhood to adulthood. So you can get a better idea of how it has worked for parents, school professionals and parenting experts who have used my research, here are a few real-world testimonials:

It’s So Affirming As A Parent To Have The Tools To Diffuse These Potentially Dangerous Situations…

Mike Roach, Parent, Portland, OR

It’s Been Like A Good Infection… One That Empowers Individuals To Treat Each Other With More Respect

“I was inspired to raise my children better and interact with other people's children in a more supportive way. I've watched my children help other children navigate through their experiences. It's been like a 'good infection' of sharing information that empowers individuals to treat each other with more respect.” Bev Warren-Leigh, Mother

It Will Help Us Raise Confident, Creative And Caring Daughters

“It’s hard for busy parents of girls to get together and share their concerns and ideas. Raising Our Daughters gives them an easy-to-use framework for getting together, learning and supplying each other with much-needed support. The book overflows with great information that will help all of us raise confident, creative and caring daughters.” Nancy Gruver, Founder of New Moon Girls magazine (www.newmoon.com) and author of How to Say It to Girls: Communicating with Your Growing Daughter

This Has Improved Our Relationship And Has Proven That We Can Talk About Anything

Mary d'Autremont, Mother of a daughter, 11, and son, 13

These Guides Are Treasure Troves For Parents Seeking Reliable Help For Raising Children

"I have not seen a more comprehensive guide for raising boys and girls than these discussion manuals. With so many down-to-earth topics and so many experts writing about what they know well, these guides are treasure troves for parents seeking reliable help for raising children in today's challenging world." William Doherty, PhD, founder of Putting Family First at puttingfamilyfirst.org and author of The Intentional Family, Putting Family First, and many other books supporting healthy families.

At this point you're beginning to see how powerful the resources we put together are and how it has impacted the lives of parents and school professionals just like you.

I Want To Share My Life’s Experience To Help Other Parents

Once you have all of these resources, you’ll essentially have the map and the compass that will help you navigate to a more connected relationship with your daughter and help her become a healthy and productive adult. So that's exactly what I want to give you... all the knowledge, experience and resources I have compiled and tested during the past 14 years. Introducing...

Raising Our Daughters: The Ultimate Parenting Guide for Healthy Girls and Thriving Families Here's what is included in your Parenting Guide:

A compilation of over 200 of the best parenting resources (updated in 2009) from more than 120 authors organized into 10 easy-to-understand chapters.

In each chapter, you’ll receive:

Clear goals and an overview of the topics covered in the chapter
Sample discussion questions to help guide your individual learning and, where appropriate, group discussions with other parents
A list of action steps you can take right now to put your new knowledge into practice
A list of resources, books and DVDs you can explore to understand the chapter’s theme more deeply.

Order Raising Our Daughters now—and start empowering your daughter today!

That’s a broad overview of what the parenting guide includes and how things are organized... Here's a more detailed breakdown of what's covered:

Discover The 40 Developmental Assets That Help Girls Successfully Navigate Childhood and Adolescence

Explore the 3 traits all girls possess that bring resilience and success.
Discover why girls are more unprotected against risks of sexual activity, depression, eating disorders and substance abuse today and why it’s not your fault.
Learn about the relationship between pre-adolescence and high-risk behavior… and what you can do to help your daughter be her "true self."
Find out which traits you should work on now to help your daughter develop safer and better decision-making skills.

Unlock The Truth About Today’s Media Culture And How It Influences Sexuality And Violence In Girls

Discover how girls can support one another in spite of the media messages that define popularity through unhealthy behavior.
Learn how to encourage your daughter to lead with her personality, intelligence and talents instead of her sexuality.
Learn how to set up guidelines at each stage of your daughter’s childhood that protect her from people who prey on innocent children through the Internet and other media.
Discover why violence in the media doesn’t just impact boys and how you can avoid the potential harm to your daughter.

Discover The Unique Roles A Mother And Father Should Play In Creating A Healthy And Connected Relationship With Their Daughter

Discover how curiosity can promote a more fulfilled and connected relationship with your daughter.
Unlock the truth about how fathers can help their daughters appreciate their bodies as being powerful and functional, not just an “ornament” to admire.
Avoid the most common error parents make when children make mistakes and why this is so critical during the teenage years. Hint: it’s not what you think.
Discover why new and old family rituals are essential for communication with your daughter.

Pierce Through The Cultural Myths, Rituals And Taboos That Plague Girls As They Transition To Womanhood

Discover how to overcome your fear and protect your daughter as she exerts her sexuality and curiosity about romantic relationships.
Remove gender stereotypes that are placed on girls and women today by developing your daughter’s "emotional intelligence."
Learn how to avoid the increased psychological risks that confront our daughters during puberty.

Overcome The Cultural Limits Placed On Girls Today To Create Strong, Smart And Bold Daughters

Discover how to prevent your daughter from losing her voice and self-identity as she enters her adolescent years.
Unlock the critical role a mother must play in the struggle of balancing life and the dreams you have for her. Hint: It has nothing to do with your daughter.
Learn how to overcome the risks of depression, passivity and withdrawal by supporting the development of your daughter’s self-concept.
Learn how and when to teach financial responsibility to your daughter. Hint: The repercussions of being broke at age 8 are much less serious than those that occur at age 21!

How To Intervene Effectively In Your Daughter’s School Community To Promote An Equitable And Safe Learning Environment

Discover the sad truth about sexual harassment in our schools today and how you can intervene with your school community to make sure your daughter is safe.
Why you should be particularly concerned about bullying between girls and what you can do to help.
Unlock the one academic area most girls ignore that will significantly limit their future success.

Learn How To Demonstrate Integrity In Your Actions So That You Do The Things That Matter Most To You And To Your Daughter

Discover how to take control of the day-to-day chaos in your own life to show your daughter a life worth living.
Unlock the tools that will help you manage your stress as a parent.
Learn why shifting your attention from a culture of “doing” to “being” will unlock valuable de-stressing skills that benefit you and your daughter.

Why Protecting Your Daughter From Forming Her Own Identity Will Only Increase Her High Risk-Taking Behavior

Unlock how to help your daughter move from making decisions based on resistance to making thoughtful choices that are based on values and needs.
Learn how to avoid the trauma of eating disorders by teaching (and modeling) a healthy and joyful relationship with food.
Discover how to overcome the simple yet difficult fact that your daughter is a sexual being and how best to prepare her for life.
Understand why teens who have developed a level of comfort talking about sexual issues within their home are less likely to engage in casual or unsafe sex and how you can create this environment of trust.

Discover How To Create Safe Havens Where Your Daughter Can Be Her Best Self (And Be Accepted By Both You And Her Friends)

Learn how creating and strengthening commitments between children and other adults during your daughter’s early years of childhood will help her during the stormy adolescent years.
Unlock what types of girls’ support groups increase self-help and decrease self-harm and alcohol use.
Discover the truth about mentors and how these programs have been proven to reduce substance abuse and skipping school.

… and that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

So How Much Is This Parenting Guide Going To Cost?

For starters, there's no other parenting guide anywhere that covers the topic of raising your daughter with this level of depth. And you will benefit from the countless testing and refinements I have made over the past 14 years helping 1000s of adults improve their relationships with their daughters. This is why this powerful and easy-to-understand book, Raising Our Daughters: The Ultimate Parenting Guide for Healthy Girls and Strong Families, is invaluable. If you are truly committed to maximizing the precious moments with your children and nurturing them to discover their best selves so that they may become productive citizens of the world…this book is for you. You see, my goal is simple. I want to you to experience the power that comes when together — we as parents, school communities, and neighborhoods — create and support thriving, healthy children.

To your parenting success,

Kathy Masarie, MD Founder of Family Empowerment Network